Wheaten Dark (Griffin’s), Wheaten Milk (Griffin’s) In this case, the unexpected was to eat a biscuit that tasted like it was comically large (you know how all massive foods taste crap) except it was tiny.ĩ8-97. The packaging was a bit different and the famous buzzy tea ads had me expecting the unexpected. Great enough to not need a white chocolate version.Īll 123 chip flavours in New Zealand ranked from best to worst Unless you come in green packaging, take your ginger and your nuts and get the hell out. Ginger Ninja (I Love Baking), Gingernuts (Countdown), Finest Ginger Chunk (Pams), Gingernut (Baker Boys), Ginger Nut (Arnott’s) What a waste! Just pool your money and make one good biscuit! Ideas like this are why I will never be rich.ġ06-102. It’s like every Countdown brand biscuit is actually made from exactly the same stuff and just painted to look like different flavours. Putting them all in that group at the start. These are Countdown brand, wafers (notoriously maligned), and vanilla (literally used as an insult against boring people). First crime: taking the name of a beloved biscuit and then not being anything like it. Just as I have no business wearing dresses with thin straps, Griffin’s has no business making digestives.Ī double felony has been committed. Fruit Digestives (Griffin’s), Wheat Digestives (Griffin’s), Digestives Milk (Griffin’s) This one, though, is entirely dispensable.ġ14-112. The Arnott’s with the plain white packaging has a lot of similar but good biscuits. Griffin’s malt? Cardboard Arrowroot but make it brown. There are a few exceptions, which you’ll see further down the list, but as a rule of thumb, go for the name brand on special and it’s the same price, only infinitely better. Super Tea (Countdown), Cranberry White Choc (Countdown), Peanut Brownie (Countdown), Choc Fudge (Countdown), Fruit and Oat (Countdown), Choc Chip Cookies (Countdown), Shortbread (Countdown), Choccy Wheats (Countdown), Choccy Mints (Countdown), Choccy Caramels (Countdown), Choccy Fingers (Countdown), Mallow Wheels (Countdown), Thins (Countdown), Rocky Road (Countdown), Chocolate Sandwich (Pams), Chocolate Mint Slice (Pams), Chocolate Caramel Treat (Pams), Chocolate Rocky Road (Pams), Milk Chocolate Digestives (Pams)Īs much as I love a bargain and love an underdog, the Countdown and Pams basic ranges are all bad rip-offs of the real deal. What are these? Seriously I’ve never seen them before and everything about them sounds yuck.ġ35-117. The chunky black packaging is a stain on an otherwise beautiful biscuit aisle. Rugby is but a faint memory in our collective conscience and yet these gross biscuits refuse to die. Where did these even come from? I thought they were a Rugby World Cup thing that stuck around while they tried to get rid of stock but the world cup was so long ago. Rugby-shaped cookies (The devil, probably)

When searching for biscuits in the New World online shop and sorting by popularity, lowest to highest, this abomination was the first result.ġ38. Fernz Caramelised White Chocolate Biscuits (Griffin’s)

Like going for a walk through the desert, but the desert’s in your mouth.ġ39. Congratulations, you just baked an Arrowroot biscuit. Cut out a piece of cardboard in the shape of an oval. Milk Arrowroot (Arnott’s), Milk Arrowroot (Griffin’s) No, you will not find some weird, cursed, orange-flavoured Tim Tam on this list.ġ42-141.

Rest assured, if they were available all the time, they would rank highly. Girl Guide biscuits aren’t available at supermarkets year-round (they certainly weren’t there this month) and therefore don’t make the list. They are not a biscuit, as I believe a biscuit is something you would eat more than one of in a sitting. They’re made and sold as a single item, to be eaten alone. Disqualified:Ī Cookie Time is a one-off snack. In times of crises, every biscuit counts.īut before we can count them, some ground rules. Perhaps in 2019 we would have been fooled into accepting a top 10 list, or even a top 20. You probably thought there were a handful of good biscuits at the supermarket but you’ll soon see that there are respectable choices well into the 60s on this list. To mention some biscuits and not others would simply be an attempt to hide our biscuit privilege. In a world without restaurants, cafes and bakeries, all that remains for supper is biscuits. And now, Madeleine Chapman returns to bring the nation together as one, with this, her longest list yet, an unimpeachable ranking of the biscuits.

Tim tams new zealand